Sunday, June 27, 2010

They didn't have it all together

My sister was born when I was two and a half, when she about three weeks old, I broke my arm. I was sleeping with my parents in their waterbed and ended up falling off the bed and hitting my arm on the frame on the way down. My mom consoled me, made sure I could bend my elbow and wrist; I stopped crying and went back to sleep. In the morning my dad was about to go to work, my mom was caring for my sister and another baby she watched, when I walked out and said, "My arm still hurts." When my mom looked over, she could see my arm bone making my skin protrude. My dad said, "Okay, well I'm off to work!" and just left my mom to deal with it. She says he got a godsmack later that day when his pen exploded on his shirt.

I love this story.

I was talking to my mom last night and we were talking about other things that were going on at that time. My dad had been in a car accident when he was delivering papers for extra money and they were having trouble with the other guy's insurance company. My grandma, and both grandpas called the insurance company and gave them a piece of their minds. My parents ended up getting like $8,000 but had to use it to pay the hospital because when my sister was born they didn't have insurance. Also when my sister was born we were living in a house in Texas and my mom told me last night that my dad's mom helped them buy the house and paid half their house payment.

I think those times must have been really hard for them, but it makes me feel much better about where Brad and I are. I always thought of my parents as having it all together, but knowing that they were struggling financially when they first had us gives me hope about our situation now. Also knowing that their parents were still helping them fight their battles helps my pride. My car got towed about a month ago and my Mom went with me to fight the guy about it. I know now how my mom became the warrior she is today, for us. I see can see myself becoming more like that for Kennedy.

My parents are also the reason I will never be scared to change careers, they both went back to school in their fourties for their masters and my dad is even working on his doctorate right now. My dad completely changed his career (back) over ten years ago from accounting to ministry.

That is what makes me sad for many, many men out there. I think they feel that when they get married they must stop having fun and provide for their family even if it makes them completely unhappy. Yeah, some days I wish Brad made a lot of money, but I would rather he find what makes him completely fulfilled and happy and do that, and hopefully he makes money doing it too. I would rather be happy and poor than well off and unhappy. I always am aghast at the couple who adopts the baby in the movie Juno, but I think it is like that a lot, the wife pressures the husband to give up on his dreams because he is a "grown up" now. I would never ask Brad to stop playing music, or to move all of his "stuff" into one room because those things make him happy and he has just as much right to have his Godzilla toys on display as I have to keep my Twilight books out (we are dorks).

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