They didn't have it all together

My sister was born when I was two and a half, when she about three weeks old, I broke my arm. I was sleeping with my parents in their waterbed and ended up falling off the bed and hitting my arm on the frame on the way down. My mom consoled me, made sure I could bend my elbow and wrist; I stopped crying and went back to sleep. In the morning my dad was about to go to work, my mom was caring for my sister and another baby she watched, when I walked out and said, "My arm still hurts." When my mom looked over, she could see my arm bone making my skin protrude. My dad said, "Okay, well I'm off to work!" and just left my mom to deal with it. She says he got a godsmack later that day when his pen exploded on his shirt.



I love this story.



I was talking to my mom last night and we were talking about other things that were going on at that time. My dad had been in a car accident when he was delivering papers for extra money and they were having trouble with the other guy's insurance company. My grandma, and both grandpas called the insurance company and gave them a piece of their minds. My parents ended up getting like $8,000 but had to use it to pay the hospital because when my sister was born they didn't have insurance. Also when my sister was born we were living in a house in Texas and my mom told me last night that my dad's mom helped them buy the house and paid half their house payment.



I think those times must have been really hard for them, but it makes me feel much better about where Brad and I are. I always thought of my parents as having it all together, but knowing that they were struggling financially when they first had us gives me hope about our situation now. Also knowing that their parents were still helping them fight their battles helps my pride. My car got towed about a month ago and my Mom went with me to fight the guy about it. I know now how my mom became the warrior she is today, for us. I see can see myself becoming more like that for Kennedy.



My parents are also the reason I will never be scared to change careers, they both went back to school in their fourties for their masters and my dad is even working on his doctorate right now. My dad completely changed his career (back) over ten years ago from accounting to ministry.



That is what makes me sad for many, many men out there. I think they feel that when they get married they must stop having fun and provide for their family even if it makes them completely unhappy. Yeah, some days I wish Brad made a lot of money, but I would rather he find what makes him completely fulfilled and happy and do that, and hopefully he makes money doing it too. I would rather be happy and poor than well off and unhappy. I always am aghast at the couple who adopts the baby in the movie Juno, but I think it is like that a lot, the wife pressures the husband to give up on his dreams because he is a "grown up" now. I would never ask Brad to stop playing music, or to move all of his "stuff" into one room because those things make him happy and he has just as much right to have his Godzilla toys on display as I have to keep my Twilight books out (we are dorks).

in which I cry a lot

Brad was having problems with his asthma yesterday so he stayed home from work. His inhaler had just run out the night before. I told him to call Target to get it refilled and then I would pick it up after work. But he messaged me back that he couldn't talk enough to call Target. I called him right away because I didn't understand what he meant; he was having such a hard time breathing that he could barely talk in full sentences. I freaked out. Remember in that Sex in the City episode where Big is going to have heart surgery and Carrie would just start crying when she tried to talk about it. That was me. I went to the bathroom and balled my eyes out. I left work (after barely being able to ask to leave without crying more) and picked up his inhaler and brought it to him and cried some more right after he used his inhaler and was almost instantly better. I was just so scared. Of course he wasn't scared and said it happens sometimes. I had to remind him that it has never been that bad since we've been together and that has been four+ years.

Of course later that night he felt well enough to have a cigarette. Don't get me started on that.

Juanita June Teach (Lidgard) 1920-2008

My Great Grandmother died yesterday at home, asleep, surrounded by her family. She hasn't been doing well for awhile and broke her hip a few weeks ago while in Hawaii and it has been downhill since then. This weekend all the family was called to come and visit her because she wasn't really waking up anymore and they were just keeping her comfortable. We didn't know how long she would last because of her pacemaker, but she died yesterday and my Dad told me he was by her side.

I am feeling very sad for my Great Aunt Sally right now. A year ago she was living with three people; her husband Lee, her mother (my g.grandmother) and her stepfather (my step-great grandfather and my ggma's fourth husband). My step-g.grandfather died earlier last year, my Great Uncle Lee died a couple of days after our wedding in October and now my grandmother. It has been a lot for her to handle and I'm not sure where she will go from here.

My g.grandma was 88 years old and only in the last six months or so has her memory even started going at all. She went to Hawaii only a few weeks ago to visit her son and always commented on how she needed to meet new men. She was funny and opinionated. I love that when I went to visit her in October, she told me that she really liked Obama. I wish I would have known more about her life; I don't even know much about my parents' lives when they were younger. My family is not big on sharing which is something I plan on changing with my own family. But she did tell me one story not too long ago.

I asked her how she got together with my g.grandfather; she told me the story of how when she was about 20 she was dating a Bohemian (her words, I didn't quite know what that meant) and her Mother did not like it one bit. Della forbid her from seeing the said Bohemian. So to spite her mother, Juanita married my great grandfather Ralph Irwin who was 20 years her senior. Well her mother was not happy about that either. Always the rebellious one!

Love and Marriage

Brad and I were at my great-aunt’s house yesterday with some family and I told my great uncle that me and my boyfriend have been together for 2+ years. Then he gave me the look, and I knew the next question was going to be, "So when are you going to get married?" I loathe this question. But I gave him a look and he said, “What?” and so I said, “ I’m waiting for the question.” Everyone laughed and I thought they got it, but then Brad gave me a look. I realized then that they thought I meant, "I am waiting for him to ask me to marry him. Silly boy, he just can't make a commitment!"

So brad and I were talking later and we decided that I should have said, "No, we are not planning on getting married for a long while; we are just going to continue living in sin, and we may even have a child out of wedlock. Oh yeah, and we don't believe in the Christian God!" And then we would back out slowly, run to the car, and never return. It's funny how little my extended family knows me. I don't do much to rectify this, but it's just interesting.